Funny The Way It Is

Funny the way it is that change has the ability to make people reflect upon the past, look at the current, and worry about the future.

This exact thought has been racing through my mind for the past week as I have began preparing for my next endeavor - receiving my Masters of Tax Accounting from the University of Alabama. While I am extremely excited to continue my education, as the first sentence might show, there are many worries and uncertainties in my life.

As I reflect on the past and think about my time on the Hilltop, I subconsciously block out the bad times and only allow myself to remember the good. Flashbacks to soccer games, where my nerves were on edge going into overtime, remind me that I fulfilled a dream that only few can live out. Then I begin to think about the family-like relationships that were developed with my coaches and teammates through two-a-days, wins, losses, tragedy and adversity. These friendships promptly lead me to think about the other relationships that I was able to establish through classes, study abroad, and numerous other ways.

Gradually, I move on from reflecting about the past to thinking about the present. I think about how happy I am. I am currently exercising all of the time and slowly but surly becoming and "triathlete." My best friends from soccer, accounting and BSC still surround me, and I have also been able to develop a few very special and wholesome relationships in the past month. Additionally, I have started to rediscover my faith. Though it was not lost, I did not do the necessary things to keep the flame burning as strong as it should have been while in college.

All of these things reaffirm how happy I am, how much I am at peace, but they also make me worry about the future. Why leave when something that seems so perfect (well minus the fact that I cannot find a job). I worry that it will be difficult to maintain the relationships that I have established over the past six years. I worry that I will be miserable in Tuscaloosa, not because it won't be fun, but because my heart is in Birmingham. I worry, and think, only about the negatives.

However, as I worry, I catch myself and I think about advice that I have previously received. I think about, while studying for the LSAT, my family telling me that "All worrying will do is give you pimples." Which, although my precious face doesn't get pimples (just kidding), is so true. Then I think about everything that I have accomplished in my life. I am potty trained, I graduated with honors from high school and college, I was a D1 athlete and I returned to soccer from a blown out knee. Just to name some of the things that I am truly proud of.

I realize that I just have to let go, trust my faith, my family and my friends, and take the bumps that come along the way. It will be hard, but I know that I will be able to maintain and even continue to develop my current relationships while adding a few more. After all, this is what this blog is about. I'm doing the right things, I'm going the right places. And although I don't know the end result, I am taking A Step In Some Direction.

*** "Funny The Way It Is" is a Dave Matthews Song from his most recent album Big Whiskey and the GrooGrux King. This song was playing while I was packing up my belongings last week and I have been thinking about these words ever since. I hope yall enjoyed the post!